Stupidity

Hello! Yes, I know I should be sitting around Isle Cafe waiting for service to start at this time but due to a stupid thing I did on Thurday night, I bruised my big toe really badly and I could hardly walk. Okay you may think that it's just a bruise, how bad can it get? I couln't sleep throughout the whole Thursday night, tried very hard to sleep but I can't help but feel the throbbing pain caused by the pressure build-up beneath my big toe nail. I really wished I could just cut my right foot off, seriously. I rather sprain my ankle.

I feel much better now, but it's really hard for me to walk. I can still feel the throbbing pain in my toe but it's much better now.

God, please heal me.

The "A" levels is like in a week's time and I slacking around for the past 2 days. I don't know why I'm really restless and I totally don't feel like studying anymore. It's like I know that I know almost most of the stuff in the syllabus and I'll just have to practice, practice and practice. But I feel that I've practiced enough and all that's left to do is to memorise some things that are left to memorise.

Everything will be over soon. I'm very sure my future's in His hands and I'm totally not worried for my results. What I'm worried about is how my parents will feel if I get undesirable results. They really pin all their hopes on me, expecting me to get into a decent university, graduate and work in some office that'll give me a good pay, in other words, lead a boring life.

A part of me really don't want to disappoint my parents, another part of me really don't want to lead such a boring life, work just to get money. I believe this is what most asian kids go through.

I believe that everyone is born with God-given talent and passion. Everyone should be living out their lives according to these talents and passion so that people in every aspect would be giving their best as they are doing what they like....

God, please show me the way..

"Your word is a lamp to my feet
and a light for my path."
Psalm 119:105